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How To Be A Great Listener

December 12, 2017

We are distracted, and our thoughts are part of the madness.  Have you ever caught yourself thinking what you're going to respond? When do you realize that you haven’t heard what the other person was saying? You were not listening; it’s time to learn how.  Today’s treasure is about listening.  I am sure that when you are telling a story or having a conversation with someone, you want the other person to hear what you have to say genuinely.  It can be annoying when you are saying something significant, and the other person jumps right into another conversation about themselves without even acknowledging what you just said.  

 

I’m guilty I have to admit that I have caught myself saying, “oh no what did he just say?” Then I’ve gone into panic mode and try to fix it.  The moment is gone, and if I didn’t practice active listening, it’s game over.  I soon realized that I had to pay more attention and learn how to listen.  I now consider myself the best listener there is because I practice the art of listening.  Every person that I come in contact with is important to me, and I am looking forward to what they have to say.  

 

We need to retrain ourselves and learn how to listen.  The benefits of practicing active listening are that it boosts your self-confidence because now you are part of an actual conversation.  Also, you practice being in the present moment and become more focused.  You develop your real ability to grow more understanding.  And when you realize it you connect on a deeper level.  

 

If you find yourself having a hard time listening, below, you will see five simple steps that helped me and still helps me be a better listener.  Hope it will help you become a better listener too.  

 

Have Time 

Let’s face it.  We are all busy, and If you are in a hurry let the other person know.  It is better to get back to them when you know you can take the time to listen.  And it is better for you because you won’t have to stop what you are doing and run the risk of being late.  It’s a win/win.

 

Be Present 

Keep eye contact.  If your eyes are wandering around the other person will feel that you are not listening. To improve this what I do is that I focus on keeping eye contact, It takes practice, I suggest to start little by little. Be aware that you are maintaining eye contact.  

 

Don’t Interrupt

Have you ever tried to finish the other person's statement? I think we have all done it, but it is annoying. It’s not a race; you are just having a conversation.  The way to stop yourself is to be attentive to the other person's thought process.  Remember, you don’t like it when people do it to you.  It takes practice, but it is worth it at the end. Stop interrupting by jumping in with solutions.

 

Engage 

Ask questions don’t read minds. By asking questions, you start to have a compelling dialog.  Keep the conversation going by being interested.  Always summarize what the other person just said, that keeps you focused on the story and helped you retain relevant information.

 

Be Genuine 

Honestly, find the space in your heart to care what the other person is telling you.  By showing that you are genuine, it helps you grow as a person.  I am one that likes to reach out to people all the time, and I genuinely care when I ask how they are doing, it boils down to this one crucial thing, that we all care in one shape or form for one another.  Let’s keep it real.  

 

In summary, nothing worthwhile comes easy.  And it is useful to have a meaningful conversation. Start practicing and watch yourself grow in the process.  Have a fantastic day. And if you are interested in a 1:1 coaching session with me reach out today.  

 

Until next week,

Coach Barb

Certified Life Coach

 

How do you practice active listening?

 

 

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